Break My Heart for What Breaks Yours, Lord

"Break my heart for what breaks Yours, Lord. Give me the strength to not look away when I see brokenness, and give me the wisdom to know how to help well."
This is my daily prayer, and God is answering it. My heart is breaking, and I’m learning to not look away.

I’ve started looking the panhandler in the eye, offering a smile, even if I don’t have anything to give. I’ve realized that, even if I can’t offer anything material, I can offer him the dignity of acknowledgment. I’m trying to truly see the refugee woman with five young children – all under six years old – and find a way to lend a hand where it’s needed. I’m stopping to engage with the man who has no clothes, wrapped in a trash bag for warmth.

For some of you, these actions might seem obvious, even second nature. But for me, this is a new and very active effort. I’ve often chosen to exit stage left when things felt uncomfortable or too big for me to fix. It's uncomfortable to sit with the tension of knowing about a need and yet not being able to fix it. But I believe God is teaching me to not look away.

It feels as though God is removing scales from my eyes, allowing me to see what I could not before. The more I pray this prayer, the more brokenness I see — sometimes in places I least expect. Let me caution you: this is a hard prayer to pray. There is brokenness everywhere — at home, in our neighborhoods, and around the world. We can't carry the weight of all those burdens on our own. Only God can bear that load.

What we can do is bring Him what we have – our "fishes and loaves."

I was reminded of this truth recently while talking to my four-year-old son, Titus, about the miracle of the loaves and fishes. I realized something profound: the disciples didn’t just give Jesus what was left over or what they could afford to spare. They gave Him their only food—the only food they had between them. There was no backup plan, no extra snacks hidden in their bags. They trusted Jesus enough to risk going hungry themselves. They offered what they had — everything they had — and allowed Jesus to work a miracle with it.

In Matthew 14:16-21, we read:

"Jesus replied, 'They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.'
'We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,' they answered.
'Bring them here to me,' he said. And he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. The number of those who ate was about five thousand men, besides women and children." (NIV)

I love that Matthew records the disciples saying, "We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish." The word "only" reveals how small and insufficient their offering seemed to them. In their hands, it wasn’t enough. But in Jesus’ hands, it became more than enough. It became an abundant feast that fed thousands, with twelve baskets of leftovers.

This is how we often see our own resources: insufficient. We look at what we have, and we think it’s not enough to make a difference. But in God’s hands, what seems small or insignificant can multiply in ways we can’t imagine.

When we offer God our "only,” He can take what we bring and use it to feed the hungry, heal the broken, and bring hope to the hopeless. Miracles happen when we trust God with what we have and allow Him to work through us.

So, as I continue to pray this difficult prayer, "Break my heart for what breaks Yours, Lord," I know that I don’t have to solve every problem or fix every need. I can bring my loaves and fish — however small they may seem — and trust that God will multiply them. Miracles await on the other side of our obedience.

Let’s offer God our "only" and watch as He turns it into more than enough.

Good vs. Perfect

How many times have you stopped yourself from doing something because you were afraid it wouldn’t be perfect? I recently helped a friend throw a small birthday party for her two-year-old son. She wanted homemade cupcakes for his party – nothing too fancy. I panicked a little bit when she made this request. I can certainly make a box cake mix or even a cake from scratch, but my skills fall off abruptly in the cake decorating department. I really wanted to just purchase cupcakes because of my severe deficiencies in this category. But I decided to honor her wishes and swallow my pride. I repeated to myself that they would taste great no matter what they looked like. 

I set the cupcakes down on the party table and did my best to make them look presentable with the smeared on icing. I put the candles in the cupcake and placed party decor around. More than 20 people came to celebrate the birthday of this sweet two-year-old. The mom and dad were beside themselves, glowing and laughing and going on and on about their gratitude for the modest party. No one complained about the look of the cupcakes. And they were all eaten. Turns out people like cake no matter what it looks like.

Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good. 

How often do we stop ourselves from doing anything because we are afraid it won’t be perfect? This makes me think of Moses. His fear of not being a good enough public speaker was severe enough that he told God he should find someone else for this job. But God called him anyway, to be a leader and to be a messenger. Moses knew the skills he had weren’t enough but he showed up anyway. 

And what did God do? God gave him Aaron. 

Exodus 4:10-17 (NIV)

10 Moses said to the Lord, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” 11 The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? 12 Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.”

13 But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.”

14 Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses and he said, “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and he will be glad to see you. 15 You shall speak to him and put words in his mouth; I will help both of you speak and will teach you what to do. 16 He will speak to the people for you, and it will be as if he were your mouth and as if you were God to him. 17 But take this staff in your hand so you can perform the signs with it.”

Never once in the scriptures did God ask people to show up perfect. Never once did he ask his people to figure out every detail in advance and make sure nothing ever went wrong. God asked and continues to ask people to show up faithfully with open hands, open hearts, and open minds. He asks us to trust in Him and not our own strength. 

Luke 18:27 (NIV)

Jesus replied, “What is impossible with man is possible with God.”

Perfectionism is a form of idolatry. You cannot be perfect on your own. Only God is perfect and in fact, in scripture (Mark 10:18) it states that only God is good. You cannot do the miracle on your own, and no one is asking you to. 

Show up with your excuses like Moses did but faithfully show up. God will take it from there. 

Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good. 

God Will Make a Way

I’ve had generalized anxiety and panic attacks for more than 15 years now. Most days you wouldn’t be able to tell that I’m a person who struggles with anxiety but sometimes it can be overwhelming. All of the anxious fears pile on until I feel like I am surrounded – like I am suffocating and there is no way out, at least no way that I can see or imagine. 

Sometimes in moments of heavy anxiety I try to imagine that I am an Israelite standing at the Red Sea. I have faithfully left the only land I have ever known. All of my family members and my belongings are loaded up and we are doing something unthinkable – walking with hundreds of thousands of people to a new land. Maybe the life they go to next in the new land will be better or maybe it will be worse. But for now they remain hopeful. 

That’s exactly where the Israelites find themselves in Exodus 14. They have started their journey out of Egypt and are camping next to the Red Sea. Pharaoh has decided that he made a grave mistake letting the Israelites go and has sent his army marching toward them to bring them back. 

Exodus 14:10-14

10 When Pharaoh drew near, the people of Israel lifted up their eyes, and behold, the Egyptians were marching after them, and they feared greatly. And the people of Israel cried out to the LORD. 11 They said to Moses, “Is it because there are no graves in Egypt that you have taken us away to die in the wilderness? What have you done to us in bringing us out of Egypt? 12 Isn't this what we said to you in Egypt: ‘Leave us alone that we may serve the Egyptians’? For it would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the wilderness.” 13 And Moses said to the people, “Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the LORD, which he will work for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again.14 The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”

That last line is so easy and so impossibly hard – “The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”

The enemy is coming, the anxiety is building and you are physically trapped by a sea. There is nothing you can do. There is nothing the Israelites can do but scream and God tells them to not even do that. They think they are surely about to die because their playbook of options to save the day doesn’t even come close to imagining what will happen next. 

As the enemy closes in, the Red Sea parts and dry land appears. They escape and the Egyptians that were pursuing them all drown. 

Only in God’s playbook does a crazy miracle like the parting of the Red Sea happen. Just in the nick of time – or rather exactly in God’s time. 

When my anxiety rises and I close my eyes and imagine myself by the Red Sea, I try with all the strength I can muster to take a deep breath and remember that the Lord will fight for me and all I have to do is be silent. Be silent. There is so much trust in that silence. The enemy may be closing in today, whether that enemy is anxiety or busyness or fear or worry. Things may feel out of control, the situation may truly be dire. But may I encourage you to remember God’s words to the Israelites here. You are not the one doing the fighting. Save your energy and be silent. 

Ephesians 6:12

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

Be prayerful, seek His guidance, and surrender your situation. Surrender your fears, surrender your anxieties, and choose trust. You might see something happen that you never could have dreamt of. You might just see a miracle.

Daily Bread

I’ve spent a lot of time reading and thinking about the Lord’s Prayer this summer. I just finished teaching a summer series at church on N.T. Wright’s book Surprised by Hope. He references the Lord’s Prayer often in his argument for earth being remade as the new heavens and the new earth. He hones in on the phrase “on earth as it is in heaven.” But I find myself getting mentally caught up in the size and emphasis of another request in the prayer.

Matthew 6:11 (ESV) Give us this day our daily bread.

Give me what I need to survive today – nothing more, nothing less. Manna for today. Strength for today. The ask seems so small and yet so vital – so reliant on God. There is so much trust built into this dependent ask – trust that He will provide for my needs and sustain me today and every day to come. Trust that I don’t need a whole week’s worth of bread because this isn’t a one time wish to be granted but a lifetime of daily bread. 

Matthew 6:34 (ESV) “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”

We do not know how God will supply for our needs tomorrow but we are called to trust that He will. It might be through a miracle of manna and quail appearing on the ground each morning. It might be that our jar of oil never runs dry in our faithful service to the Lord, or it may be that we will get to eat a portion of the five loaves and two fish. God has a whole different miraculous playbook for our lives that we can’t fathom. 

While I have no idea what tomorrow holds, I know who holds my hand and I know He will keep my needs met.

Change is Possible

I believe that people are capable of change. It’s actually relatively central to what I believe as a Christian — people can change and they do change. I know that I have changed throughout my lifetime. Through the power of the Holy Spirit we are remade, we are transformed, and we have the capacity to change. 

One of the foundational hopes of Christian mission is that people will change when they hear the good news. At Pentecost, in Acts 2, we see 3,000 people change through repentance and baptism upon hearing the good news. 

2 Corinthians‬ ‭3‬:‭18‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.”

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That is why it’s critical as Christians that we enter into every room looking forward to the change that is possible, believing for it, praying for it, and working for it, in the Lord. And trying in little and big ways to influence change. 

It is paramount that we stop assuming others can’t change or won’t change. 

Let us assume instead that we and others are always changing. We are always being formed — by relationships, what we read, what we listen to, what we value, our life experiences, etc. 

Romans 12:2 ESV

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Don’t discount the small and big ways that you invest in the spiritual formation of yourself and those around you every day — a smile, an affirmation, a caring question, a thoughtful note, time in prayer, reading your Bible, singing worship songs. What we say and do matters. The smallest things matter. Change is possible one thing at a time. 

Freedom From & Freedom To

As we exhale the responsibilities of the school year and inhale the joyous chaos of summer, I am struck by this yearly ritual of celebrating “freedom from” and indulging in our “freedom to” – freedom from school and schedules and homework, freedom from the seemingly endless sports practices and volunteer commitments.

This freedom from our normal lives leaves a vacuum of opportunity and provides us freedom to. We soak in the sun by a pool on a warm summer day, we savor juicy watermelons, and we finally get to go on that vacation we have been planning all year. There are church camps, mission trips, and vacation Bible schools. We are free to do what we want with our time, unconstrained by our normal schedules.  

This stark contrast we find in our rhythm of life is a familiar example of the concept of “freedom from” and “freedom to.” We find a similar theme in scripture. Christ sets us free from our old lives of sin. He breaks chains and strongholds and liberates us from the sin we are so entangled in. Christ sets us free from those burdens, from guilt and shame. But what will we do with that freedom? 

So often we find ourselves not relishing in our new found freedom, but instead letting our old patterns sneak back into our lives – not soaking in our new identity but riding the line of how much we can keep from our days of slavery and still get away with. The freedom Christ died to give us is to be celebrated and fully transformative. You are no longer a slave, you are a new creation, and you are free. Exhale bondage, fear, shame, guilt. Inhale worthiness, being truly known and fully loved.

Take some time today to identify what you feel set free from and how you want your freedom to play out in our life and service to God?

Galatians 4:7 ESV

So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.

John 8:34-36 ESV

Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who practices sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son remains forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

Colossians 1:13-14 ESV

“He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”

God of Abundance

The God we serve is a god of abundance. He is the generous host and creator of this world that He has placed us in. In nearly every story in scripture, we see humans struggling to trust that our God will be generous to them. And, in countless instances, we see God or a messenger of God telling the people not to fear, to trust in God, and that God will provide. And over and over again God provides – often in unexpected ways, through unexpected people, and almost never in the timing the people have prescribed.

My ears perk up when I see Jesus using scarcity language in Luke 10:2. He says this as he sends out the seventy-two, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few.” The laborers are few and not only are they few but he instructs us to, “… pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.” 

I hear Jesus telling the church today, the harvest is plentiful – everywhere in the world, in your city, in your neighborhood, at your workplace, at your school – the harvest is plentiful. But my ears tend to hear this verse and think, “Well surely He didn’t mean here, not in my place. Everyone here already knows about God and has rejected Him.” But what if I took Jesus seriously when he says the harvest is plentiful? Not just in foreign lands, but truly everywhere. 

How would you act differently if you believed that someone you knew would come to know Christ if you were to boldly tell your personal story of redemption? And not just one person. One person would not be a plentiful crop by most farmers' standards. Jesus says the harvest is plentiful. 

Will you be so bold as to trust our generous God? Trust him to provide for you as you step out in your space to become a laborer. We need laborers at your school, at your workplace, and in your neighborhood. We are praying for laborers. Will you labor with us?

As we contemplate a risky step of obedience in our lives, let’s jump back into Luke 10. We see Jesus send the seventy-two out into the mission field, two by two. He instructs them to not take any provisions for food, money, or clothing on their missionary journeys. They were to trust that the Lord would provide for all of their needs. In Luke 10:17, we see all seventy-two of the believers come back, “The seventy-two returned with joy, saying, ‘Lord, even the demons are subject to us in your name!’”

The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. I pray that you and I will work shoulder to shoulder in this plentiful field. 

God of Abundance

Anastasia is an old coworker of mine, who immigrated to the United States when she was eight years old. Her parents were professors and fled the Soviet Union. They lived in cramped apartments for most of her life until they could afford a more spacious home. They moved into a four bedroom home while she was in college.

Much to Anastasia’s surprise, her mom intentionally left an entire room of the house completely empty. Her mom smartly organized every room so that she could keep this whole room empty. She kept that door open and smiled every time she passed it. To her that was the ultimate sign of wealth – so much space that you didn’t have to fill it all. 

When Anastasia told me this story it stood out to me as a striking contrast to how most people I know view space – the more space you have, the more stuff you accumulate to fill it. More is more to most Americans. I now recognize this as an abundance mindset versus a scarcity mindset. A person with an abundance mindset is more easily satisfied, trusting that they have enough and there will be enough in the future if a need were to arise. Whereas the person with the scarcity mindset tends to think: what if I need this or that in the future? What if this or that is unavailable to me? What if there isn’t enough?

But the thing is, we serve the God of the entire universe – the Creator of everything. He promises to meet our every need (Philippians 4:19). So why do we spend so much time filling our empty rooms with things we might need one day? Why do we not trust that our God has made an abundant world of enough – enough space, enough time, enough resources, enough love, enough of everything we truly need. 

Our God instructs us that there is such an abundance of time and all resources, that one entire day a week we should not work but instead rest – rest in Him and trust the God of abundance who established Sabbath, that everything that needs to get done, will get done. 

Exodus 20:8-10 8“Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. 9Six days you shall labor and do all your work, 10but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns. 11For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy. (NIV)

One day a week, we have been instructed to not work. Yet we can not fathom how this is even possible. There is so much to do and there is so little time. We act as though keeping the Sabbath holy is a luxury we cannot afford. But as it turns out the God we serve is a god of abundance and not scarcity and He will be faithful to us in our obedience to Him. 

Matthew 6:31-34 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (NIV)

The Liminal

Psalms 23:4 (ESV)

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

In this season of lent, I want to take some time to talk about Saturday of the crucifixion weekend. We spend a lot of time in anguish over the activities of Friday and rejoicing in the events of Sunday, but we don’t often sit in the confusion, brokenness, and disarray of Saturday. Maybe the reason we don’t spend a lot of time discussing it is because all four gospels skip from Joseph of Arimathea laying Jesus’ body in a tomb on Friday to the day after the Sabbath – Sunday – when the women go to the tomb.

But I have to wonder what that Sabbath day was like for the followers of Jesus – the disappointment, the shock, the disbelief that must have been going through every follower of Jesus' mind. The Messiah had come and Rome was still in power; the Jewish believers' vision and expectation of a military revolution had been torn apart.

In my mind's eye, all of the disciples were laying in bed weeping – unable to eat, unable to sleep, unable to be consoled, ashamed that they left Jesus in his hour of need, afraid they might be next, and unsure how to move forward. All the while, they held on to a glimmer of hope that maybe Jesus would rise from the dead.

This day of disorientation feels so familiar to me. So much of our human experience feels like Saturday of Holy Week – sitting squarely in the tension between heartache and hope, plodding our way through uncharted territory, and wondering when things will be back to normal. The good news is that God was and is God over Saturday too. Even though Jesus was in the tomb, God was still ruling over all.

Colossians 1:16-17 (ESV)

For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

As we approach Easter, I encourage you to find solidarity with the believers at this moment in our Christian heritage, solidarity as we wait to see the hand of the Lord move in our own lives, for the prayers yet to be answered, and our hopes that are left lingering.

Worth By Association

Maybe you follow football and knew of Travis Kelce before he started dating Taylor Swift. Or maybe for you, like a lot of Americans, he became a household name after he started dating such a superstar. She has clearly propelled his net worth and his fame – all because he is associated with her and masses all over the world love Taylor Swift.

The internet's fascination with this love story and Travis’s increased worth since being in Taylor’s orbit has me thinking a lot about increased worth by association. Why is it that we are so much more attracted to what other people have given their stamp of approval to?

This Valentines week, I want to remind you what the Bible says about your worth by association with God.

In Romans 8:16-17, Paul proclaims that we are adopted children of God and as His children we are heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ.

Peter declares in 1 Peter that we are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession (1 Peter 2:9).

Throughout Scripture we learn that, God knew us before we were born (Jeremiah 1:5), He chose us (Ephesians 1:4), we are His children (1 John 3:1) and there is nothing we can do to separate us from the love of Christ (Romans 8:38-39).

Our worth is established by Him and secured in Him. We are safe in His presence. He made the ultimate sacrifice so that we can be forgiven and forever associated with Him.

I pray that you can live in this love today. God’s love for us may not result in a huge social media following, millions of dollars or an NFL contract – what He has to offer is even better. He promises to never leave or forsake us (Deuteronomy 31:8). He is our good Father who is faithful to meet our every need. You are loved by the only one whose love has eternal impact.

Ask. Seek. Knock.

As we embark on a New Year with new hopes and dreams, I pray that a perspective shift can be a part of this new version of ourselves in 2024. Many of my friends spent the first week of the year making vision boards, declaring resolutions, and intention setting for the year. We have been focusing on our words for 2024 and investing in the power of positive thinking and self-talk. The gyms are bustling and the health food aisles are packed as people pay attention to their health with renewed efforts. We are willing our best selves into existence this year, we are striving to meet our goals, and we will hustle until we get there.

But maybe instead of willing, striving, and hustling we should take a step back from white-knuckling it and remember that our God invites us to ask, seek, and knock.

Matthew 7:7-11 (ESV)

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”

What would you ask of God this year? 

Maybe you are in need of the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22) this year. He will be faithful to give you a double portion of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, if you ask for it.

Maybe you are seeking a closer relationship with God but you struggle with daily Bible reading. I am believing in a God that will always help you delight in Him. (Jeremiah 15:16)

Maybe you are knocking on a new door of opportunity and you have no idea which direction to go. Lean into prayer as you knock on that door. God will be faithful to make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

I encourage you to not be afraid of how God will answer your request, guide your search, or open the door. Trust His plan and lean fully into His good gifts

Will you trust that Jesus meant what he said in Matthew 7 and boldly ask, seek, and knock this year?